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Home > Cats > How To Get a Cat to Trust You: 7 Tips to Follow

How To Get a Cat to Trust You: 7 Tips to Follow

cat cuddling with owner

Whether you’ve just brought a cat home from the shelter or have your eye on an outdoor cat you want to make your own, you’ll need to learn how to gain your cat’s trust. Gaining a cat’s trust can take time and patience, but once you’ve earned it, you will have made a life-long friend.

The most critical step to befriending a cat is to help him feel secure around you. In this article, we will go over seven steps you should follow to earn the trust of even the wariest of cats.


How to Get Started

Before diving in, you must make a few preparations.

Provide a Safe Haven for Your Cat

Predominantly, your cat will need his own space where he feels safe. By providing your cat with secure, comfortable areas in your home, you can help him settle and acclimate to his new environment. A warm spot to sleep, a clean place to eat and drink, and an isolated location to use the bathroom will go a long way toward making your cat feel more comfortable.

Offering plenty of toys, places to perch, and locations to hide will also comfort your cat. If your cat can keep himself entertained, he will be less likely to become restless. Before bringing a cat home, be sure to have these areas covered.

cat snuggling with owner
Image Credit: cottonbro, Pexels

Understand Your Cat

If you adopted your cat from a shelter, the shelter might be able to disclose some information about your cat’s background. If your cat has suffered a history of neglect or maltreatment, it will be harder for you to gain his trust. You must be especially patient in this instance; demonstrating yourself as a soothing presence will be necessary.

Learn Your Cat’s Body Language

Cats communicate with us through their body language. If you don’t understand your cat’s non-verbal communication, you may miss important information your cat is trying to convey, which can lead to misunderstandings and splintered trust.

Try to brush up on feline body language basics before bringing a cat home. Your cat may use many parts of the body to communicate with you, but primarily, your cat will use his tail, eyes, and posture.

When it comes to your cat’s tail, take note of these situations:

  • The tail is held high and straight up: This is a sign that your cat is feeling comfortable, confident, and happy.
  • The tail is moving: A slow-moving tail suggests that your cat is focusing, whereas a fast-moving tail may mean that he is agitated.
  • The tail is puffy: If the fur on your cat’s tail is flared out, this is a clear sign that something is wrong. Your cat may be frightened or bracing himself for conflict.

Pay attention to your cat’s eyes as well, which can indicate the following:

  • Dilated pupils may mean that your cat is vigilant or high-strung. This is an excellent time to leave your cat alone.
  • Half-closed eyes show that your cat is feeling comfortable and secure. If you notice your cat’s eyes drooping when he is around you, you are doing something right!

Your cat’s posture is another key to interpreting his body language.

  • If your cat is arching his back, stay away. This is a sign that he feels threatened and is preparing for a fight.
  • When your cat rolls over and shows his belly, it is a sign that he trusts you. However, most cats do not enjoy having their bellies rubbed, so don’t mistake this behavior as an invitation to touch his tummy.

Once you understand feline non-verbal communication, you will be better equipped to encourage a cat to trust you.

cat touching his owners face
Image Credit: VikaJpeg, Shutterstock


The 7 Tips for Getting a Cat to Trust You

To gain a cat’s trust, follow these seven steps.

1. Regularly Offer Food and Water

Your cat’s tummy may be the quickest way to his heart. By establishing a consistent feeding routine, your cat will learn that you are the provider of his food, water, and shelter.

Depending on how shy or nervous your cat is, you may want to sit at a distance while he eats. Standing may make him feel like you are looming over him, which can be intimidating. If you sit in the room while he is eating and speak in a soft, soothing voice, you can help him grow accustomed to your presence.

If he doesn’t want to eat with you around, then start slow. Give him his food and leave the room so that he feels secure enough to eat. The rest will come with patience and time.

cat being fed a cat treat or cat food by hand
Image Credit: Jakub Zak, Shutterstock

2. Use Scents to Help Cats Relax

As your cat is acclimating to his new environment, scents can be a great tool to help him settle. Purchasing a synthetic pheromone diffuser is one way that you can make your cat feel calm. You can also put one of your unwashed shirts in his bed or near his favorite things so he can grow accustomed to your scent and feel secure with it.

3. Check Your Behavior

While you are trying to gain your cat’s trust, you may be unknowingly behaving against your own interests. If you want your cat’s trust, you must be a source of comfort and security in his life. If you are accidentally scaring him, you will never gain his trust.

When house training your cat, always use positive reinforcement. Never raise your voice when you spot your cat doing something he should not; instead, softly praise him when he performs desirable tasks. Likewise, ensure you are not sneaking up on your cat or frightening him with sudden motions.

woman owner petting and playing with her cat at home
Image Credit: Stokkete, Shutterstock

4. Determine When Your Cat is Ready to Interact

If you have been sitting nearby while your cat eats, watch for signs that he is ready to interact with you. If he sits near you or sits with his back to you and begins to groom himself, it signifies that he is starting to feel more comfortable in your presence. However, wait to approach him. You are still working on building his trust.

5. Make an Effort to Be Non-Threatening

Once your cat becomes more comfortable around you, start presenting yourself as non-threatening as possible. For instance, you can lie down and turn your head away from your cat. This will help him feel even more secure with you, and he may approach you of his own volition.

cat and owner in bed
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6. Allow Your Cat to Set the Pace

If your cat does approach you, let him set the pace. Don’t immediately rush to pet him or display other physical affection; moving too fast can disrupt your progress. If your cat begins to bump his head against you, it shows he feels much safer with you.

7. Spend Time with Your Cat

After your cat regularly approaches you and bumps his head against you, you can begin playing or showing signs of affection. You can increase your bond significantly by making playtime a regular part of your daily routine. Eventually, you can gently scratch your cat’s head and ears. Continue to check your behavior to ensure that you are as non-threatening as possible, and soon enough, you will have fully gained your cat’s trust.

cat owner feeding her pet cat
Image Credit: Milles Studio, Shutterstock

divider-catThe 3 Signs that Your Cat Trusts You

Cats can be social and affectionate, but it’s challenging to tell when they fully trust you. Below are some of the signs that may indicate that your cat is feeling comfortable and secure around you.

1. Your Cat Loves to Be Around You

Of course, cats enjoy their private time, so your cat won’t be glued to you 24/7. But if a good portion of your day at home is spent with your feline friend, that is a strong indicator that your cat feels happy and safe around you.

Cat welcomes his owner at home
Image Credit: Jaromir Chalabala, Shutterstock

2. Your Cat Shows Physical Affection

If your cat grooms, kneads, or rubs his face on you, it means he trusts you.

3. Your Cat Is Talkative with You

Does your cat chirp or meow when you come home? This means he’s happy you’re back and that you make him feel safe.

grey cat getting pet by owner
Image Credit: 99mimimi, Pixabay



Felines are not widely perceived as being as affectionate as canines, but they can be loyal companions when you establish trust. A cat’s trust is a precious thing to have, so don’t take it for granted. Once you have your cat’s trust, continue to treat your cat with the same consideration you displayed while trying to gain it. By treating your cat with respect, you will cultivate a strong bond with your cat that enriches both of your lives.

Featured Image Credit: Impact Photography, Shutterstock

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